Mr Lips.

Hello you lot!  So I mentioned in my last post that I had a new squeeze.  I am writing to tell  you that I am enjoying the squeezing!  Let me tell you a little about him.  He is the same age as me.  He has never been married and he doesn't have any kids.  He has island heritage, Jamaican to be precise.  He was educated in the same way as me, which is a refreshing change from the usual for a black man from south London.  He works hard and is driven, which again I find so attractive after my experiences in previous relationships.  He is a gentleman, well mannered and polite.

I think I am in love......I am really hoping that I am not but, I do believe I am.  Annoying, as it's not reciprocated.  Was hoping to never be in this position again, unrequited love.  I tried to keep the upper hand, which lasted for all of about 30 seconds. Then I put my heart on my sleeve in full plain view.  So far he has called me hormonal, vulnerable, baby, girl, sweet, cute.  Not good I know, but with that he has peppered the conversation with, extraordinarily beautiful, hot, great mother, great bum, funny, sweet, and I catch him looking at me like he wants to take care of me and wrap me up hold me close and love me.  He always looks so surprised by my sweetness and the attention I show him. I don't know if I am right at all, but I hope so.

I have caught him watching me cook, and he loves my hands on his body, (but then who wouldn't!)  He is not generous with his kisses (resembles a cats bum) but he makes me work for what he does give me, and when he lets his guard down, his kisses are tender, sensual and turn me on so much.  I like that.  After being with some someone who adored me to the point of idolisation, there is something to say about having to make an effort rather than being in a relationship where everything is taken for granted.  It takes perseverance and energy to make a relationship work, which I am pretty sure I didn't have with my ex.  It was too easy for me.  No keeping me on my toes.

I do have feelings of love for him.  Warm, fuzzy, light, goofy, and I grin like a fool when I think of him.  He lifts my spirits and makes me feel like all my troubles have melted away.   Even after all the time that we have been seeing each other, I  still get butterflies and my tummy flips. Just want to be in the same room as him. OMG I am making myself sick with soppiness!  I can't control it!  He is funny, smart, motivated and has the most delicious thighs.  He is sweet and generous (just not with his kisses, but I am working on that because I know those lips can be so bad if he lets himself go).  He has the most kissable lips and stunning eyes to get lost in for time.  I think because I let him know how I feel, I make him uncomfortable.  I hope I don't push him away, but you know what if my love is too much for him, then he is not ready for it and surely doesn't deserve it.

Investing in this relationship is a chance I have to take. I am not saying it will be easy with me, I have my own issues too (which he is all too aware of) and two kids...I hope that is not too much to ask from him?  Mr Lips?